Chris Michael Kirk » Coaching/Leadership

Re-Imagining Our Organizations

Author CMK on July 18th, 2008

Last week, I wrote about “Re-Imagining Our Lives”. Today, I’d like us to take a moment and think about this idea in regards to the organizations, businesses, and faith communities which we lead and in which we participate. Many times our communal failure is not for lack of effort, but simply the result of a lack of imagination.

I was talking with a friend about their church a few weeks ago. This individual was commenting on how the church struggles to develop community, having difficulty getting people to commit to Sunday School classes, small groups, or fellowship times. It was quite disconcerting to the community as more and more people failed to connect due to a supposed lack of opportunity.

My response was to make a list of all the things that community did on a weekly basis. This list included multiple worship services, ministry from teens and children, and a daycare. A further review of budget and staffing revealed that the majority of the time, effort, and money of the faith community were spent in putting on the two Sunday morning worship services. Admitedly, these services were not ideal places for community to be created, but rather focused on inviting new people, preaching, and music.

So, my question was this: If community building is so of core importance, why does the overwhelming majority of resources go towards an activity which produced minimal results in that regard?

Whether you’re part of a church or work for a business, too often we get caught up in the “have-tos”, these assumptions about what must be done. Surprisingly these “have-to’s” often distract from the true mission and sometimes even derail an organization from where they want to go. If you find yourself in this situation, here are a couple of ideas to help your team re-imagine your direction.

1. Take everything off the table.

Sit down with your team and make it clear that there are no sacred cows. Nothing that is currently being done must continue to be done. Everything is negotiable. Clearing the table in this way may be terrifying, but it is the only way for the team to begin to think outside of self-imposed boxes. Whenever people revert back to the old paradigm, gently remind them that we must have a better reason for doing something than “We’ve always done this.”

2. Give a Voice to the Communal Dream

As a leader, it is your task to stoke of the fires of dream activity which reside within us all. Sometimes they are smoldering, but with some work you can kick the fire up again. Get people talking about their hopes for their common endeavor. Create space for your team members to hear each other’s hearts. Out of this process you’ll get more than a snazzy mission statement. You’ll have a shared dream which is more powerful than any other communal strength.

3. Re-Align Activity with the Dream.

So, now you’re all agreeing on what your dream is, but how do we get there. This is where it is helpful to remind people that all the sacred cows are off the table. You may have to shed some things and you may have to add some. You may have to fiddle and tinker and adjust until what you do matches with what you dream to be. You’ve imagined it, now it is time to start walking towards it, no matter how much change it takes!

I’ve had the privilege to work in a variety of settings, both ministerial and corporate, for-profit and not-for-profit. I’ve been both inspired by a common dream and drowned by a lack of one. In each type of organization, there are moments in which we must sense as leaders the opportunity to re-imagine a better way. These conversations can transform a bored, apathetic staff into an empowered team of co-leaders. Give it a try, and let me know how it works out for you.

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No Going Back

Author CMK on July 13th, 2008

The last nail was driven yesterday afternoon on the re-flooring project at our house, and I’m pleased to say that the finished product is a success. After three weeks of carpet-pulling, floor sanding, and my fair share of cuts, scrapes, and hammered knuckles, our floors are done! Last night, as I was walking through the house admiring the results of our hard work I thought, “I can’t remember what this house used to look like.”

How easily the past dis-ease becomes a distant memory when we make positive changes in our lives! I remember a similar feeling after losing a bit of weight a few years ago. Suddenly, my whole identity changed. I would look at a picture of me just months before and wonder who that guy with my face was. I’m very interested in finding ways to extend this personal growth to other areas of my life and the lives of others (ya, I’m talking about you!) Perhaps we can find some glimmer of truth in these metaphors to guide us in finding new ways to transform ourselves.

In college, my friends and I would make frequent trips to a small lake not far from our school. There, in the midst of Kansas, stood a cliff approximately 40 feet tall, overlooking the water. Night after night, we would take our turns launching our bodies through the dark unknown until we plunged into the cold, yet inviting water below. I will never forget standing on that edge for the first time and feeling the fear. All I had known was solid land and though I wanted to have this experience, I was afraid to take that critical step. Thankfully, I took the leap and will never forget flying through the air that evening.

I would suggest that the growth that you’re hoping for may never happen without a definitive, irrevocable action–a jump off a cliff or a pulling up of carpet. Natasha and I had talked about pulling up the carpet for almost a year. From the moment we moved into the house, we knew that we wanted to do it. However, for twelve months our talk failed to lead us to action and the excuses were many–lack of funds, lack of time, lack of energy with two small children running around, etc. Finally, we decided that the time was right to make the change which we knew had to happen. So, what did we do? We took a definitive, irrevocable action. We pulled up our carpet.

From the moment that carpet was ripped up, it was obvious that there was no going back. We could not simply leave the mess and pretend like nothing every happened. Before us lay a clear course of action which had to be followed through with all because we took a definitive action which was irrevocable.

Whether you’re thinking of tackling a new goal, developing a new skill, or losing some weight, I would suggest that these are things you cannot ease into it. The more you think about it, the less likely you will be to engage in the process needed for positive change. We all have a tendency to revert back to our old paradigms and bad habits, stuck with the disgusting, old carpet that we have bcome accostumed to. No, you must do something irreversible. Take a big risk. Go public. Put yourself out there to sink or swim. It’s time to go big or go home. Perhaps you need to find someone to team up with or a friend to hold you accountable. Perhaps you buy a plane ticket or put your house up for sale or fill out that application or make that phone call. Whatever your goal, I suggest that you do something that you cannot take back so that you will not end up back where you don’t want to be in the first place.

What do you think? I would love to hear some stories from your lives of how you have seen this in action. Good luck. May the rest of this summer open up opportunities for you to move beyond the point of no return.

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Into the Wild

Author CMK on July 11th, 2008

This week, Natasha and I sat down to watch the film, “Into The Wild.” I’ve been a huge fan of Jon Krakauer for awhile and was hoping that this film would do the book and the author justice. I must say that I found the film to be truly inspiring and moving. As usually happens after a good film, I was full of conversation and ideas, stimulated from the viewing experience. I’ll share some of those thoughts below. Please be aware that there may be some plot spoiling if you have yet to see the film.

First, for those who have not seen or read this story: Into the Wild follows a wild journey of a young man named, Christopher McCandless. After college graduation, he spurns Harvard Law School and the wealth of his parents, burning is money and headed out across the country. The story follows McCandless into the Alaskan wilderness where his journey culminates in an effort for rebirth. This film awakened the adventurous spirit in me (I’ll be hiking to 14,000 ft peaks next week!) and gave me plenty of philosophy to chew on. Here are a few brief ideas I drew from the film.

Sometimes it is the trappings of life which keep us down.

In the film, McCandless gives all his college fund money away to Oxfam and ditches his car. He purposely rids himself of what we consider necessities. What he knew–and I too often forget– that often those “good” things (house, car, job, habits) are the very chains which bind us from experiencing the adventure of a lifetime. It reminds me of my friend Paul, who walks in the way Jesus taught, taking very little for the journey and relying on the miracles of God and human generosity to provide for his needs. There is something magical about an unencumbered journey.

Beauty is found in this moment.

McCandless discovered that success is not found in career or wealth or achievement. He could of gone to Harvard Law School and been a success in the eyes of the world. But, this was just part of the realm of hypocrisy to him, distracting him from the beauty that was around him. On his journey, Christopher fell in love with the power of now, noticing of God’s beauty in us and around us, and the intimate interactions we have with others.

There is no fear like confinement.

When McCandless decides to leave the wilderness and discovers that the river is too fast and wide to cross, his whole demeanor changes. He no longer has the feeling of control, and begins to go a bit mad. There is something about forced isolation which can break a man or woman. This is why solitary confinement is a major punishment in our prisons. But, it is the idea of entrapment which struck me. How often can we feel trapped in many other ways…in a job, relationship, habit? These can make us act irrationally as well, and the results are never productive.

“Happiness is not real unless shared”

This is the stunning realization which McCandless makes tragically too late. Freedom and self-discovery are powerful things, but this story reminds us of our basic need for other humans. To know myself is important, but to be known and to know others is what makes me worth knowing in the first place. My friend Cliff recently vlogged about freedom and got me thinking about the concept. I often hear people say that freedom is one of the greatest, if not the greatest blessings there is. While I agree mostly, I must reflect on the limits of such freedom and our reasons for choosing such limitations. For example, ff freedom is king, than why would anyone get married or have children? Believe me, having a two-year-old infringes on your idea of personal freedom!

But, this is what I think “Into the Wild” is telling us: We can have the free adventure of a lifetime if we shed the things which don’t matter and embrace the things which do. The intangibles of money, career, lifestyle, possession, accolades– are abandoned, burned and disarmed of their power to control and box us into tiny cubicles of boredom. The intimacy of a shared laugh, a common vision, an awe-inspiring moment, a simple gesture of kindness — these are pursued, chased down with wild abandon and fiery eyes..and, when found, they must be clung to with every ounce of strength. This is the vision for the wild life I hope to lead.

So, what do you think? What do you need to abandon for your journey to begin? What do you need to embrace for your journey to reach true happiness?

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Re-Imagining our Lives

Author CMK on July 9th, 2008

What is missing from your life right now?

Most of us find it very easy to identify (and complain about) the things that we feel we need but don’t have in our lives. Sometimes these are greedy or jealous assertions like wanting a new car, a good-looking partner, or a corner office. But, often this gnawing sense of incompleteness is evidence that our core values are not being fulfilled by the lifestyle we have chosen. When we sense this dissonance, it is time to re-imagine our lives.

What is keeping you from living the life you’ve always wanted?

Too often, we allow ourselves to be trapped in the confines of our “life” that we miss our real life. We have a lot of excuses why we’re not where we want to be—lack of money, lack of time, lack of relationships, etc. We get too busy planning for retirement or looking to the future, that we miss the beauty of the present. We mortgage our present moment for some illusion of promised future happiness which is usually defined in terms of possession or position and always is pure fantasy. What we fail to realize is that the source of all our joy and happiness is not in some far off future, but here…now. In fact, now is all we have.

What are you doing NOW?

What would you be doing if there were no limitations on you?

Certainly, there are some limitations that we must live with. None of us have the ability to fly or go without sleep for weeks at a time. But, I would suggest that most of the limitations we put on ourselves are false, existing only in the realms of mind and culture. I often hear people say, “I would do that, but I my job gets in the way.” You can replace job with whatever other word you’d like here. While jobs and other constraints may be necessary “evils” or means to an end, they too often become large behemoths which overtake our lives with their demands.

Are you ready to do whatever it takes to discover the life you’ve always wanted?

Imagine a blank canvas. This is your life. What would you paint it to be? You have all the colors and brushes that you need at your disposal. There are no lines to color within, no “rules” for this project. This is not a contest. The only judge is you.

Here is a process that you may find helpful in re-imagining your life:

1. Deconstruction: Eliminate all the assumptions that you have about life. This is difficult and cannot be done fully. For example, you can’t deconstruct your family, but you can deconstruct your way of interacting with your family. Write down every thing you do in the typical week, from eating ice cream to going to work, from exercising to entertainment. Rip it up. There is nothing sacred that cannot be taken away. You are bound by no activity.

2. Valuing: What are your core values? If you were to sum up who the ideal YOU is, what would you say? What is most important to you? Spend some time and write this down. You should have five or fewer things which matter a great deal to you and form the core principles of your life. Some people have a difficult time identifying what they value. Ask yourself what you’re passionate about, what fills you with joy, what makes you feel connected and useful in the world. Separate your true values from those imposed upon you by culture, religion, or obligation. Come up with a list of 3-5 items. For example, mine are as follows:

* Connect to God and follow The Way

* Love those around me as a husband, father, son, and friend

* Help the world flourish using my talents and abilities

* Experience full the diversity of life and the depth of joy in this moment.

3. Rebuild: Now, it’s time to refashion a life which matches your core values. This is the secret to happiness. If one of your values is family, then spending time there should be priority, not work or something else. If reading or yoga or travel are passions of yours, then they should be central to everything you do. Your life should be scheduled and defined by these things. You are no longer defined by your job title. You are defined by your passionate values and the day by day life you lead should reflect what these values in an overt fashion.

4. Evaluate: A life well-lived must be constantly evaluated. I do this on a weekly and daily basis. Each week I think ahead about my values and schedule accordingly. Then each evening I reflect on the day past and determine how my actual life matched up with my ideal life. You must give yourself grace here, as we are never perfect. We all have a tendency to drift off course, and until new habits are developed it is very easy to revert to the old way of life. Praise yourself for the small steps you take towards implementing your re-imagined lifestyle. Give yourself or a close friend permission to honestly critique your life on a regular basis and continue to make changes as needed to bring forth the life you want.

So there you have it. If you’re finding that your life in this moment doesn’t match up with the ideal life in your head, it is time for some re-imagining.

What are you waiting for?

Archive for the ‘Coaching/Leadership’ Category

Re-Imagining Our Organizations

No Going Back

Into the Wild

Re-Imagining our Lives