Chris Michael Kirk » Blog Archive » Two Exercises for a Passionate Life

Two Exercises for a Passionate Life

Author CMK on August 6th, 2008

One of the most depressing things I can imagine is to evaluate your life and find it fails to measure up to the dreams you have for it. It is tragic to reach the end of the day and realize that your time, while full of activity, was lacking in passion. And honestly, this is not that rare. How often in our culture do we get caught in the rut of the supposedly mundane or stressed at the supposedly worrysome to the point that we trudge through a work day or a night at home without really feeling connected and alive? Recently, I’ve been using a little tool which is helping me to focus on the life that I want to live. It involves using two exercices: Inention and Attention.

Intention

Oddly enough, it is possible to pass through an entire day with very little inention, simply going through the motions of habit and routine. Declaring your intention is a valuable tool in giving purpose and direction to your next moments. Much has been written in recent years about discovering your purpose in life. I agree with exploring your overall life mission, but what if we tried to live in our purpose for the next five minutes?

The Intention Exercise is very simple, but powerful I recommend doing this before each shift in task or at natural breaks during your day. Take ten seconds, think about what you’re going to do next, and declare your intention which involves both what you do and the manner in which you intend to do it. For example, after putting the kids to bed this evening I declared, “It is my intention to write a thoughtful and helpful blog post now.” This simple statement helped focus me away from the dozen other things which could grab my attention and centered my mind on the task at hand.

Of course, I didn’t say this out loud in a crowded room. It’s a small mental shift, but one which is very effective on a moment by moment basis. This exercise is highly connected to a practice of goal setting and scheduling which I do on a weekly and daily basis, trying to set my intention for the larger period ahead. The Intention Exercise helps me stay focused on these larger goals and the grand purpose of my existence.

Attention

Have you ever had good intentions, but found yourself too distracted to complete them? The Attention Exercise is a practice of living in the moment, allowing you to give your best toward your intention. It involves three parts. First, you take a deep breath and eliminate all distractions. For example, when starting this post, I closed my internet tab for the Royals game and Gmail. If I left them up, I knew my attention would be drawn to them and away from writing this post.

The second part in the Attention Exercise is give yourself fully to the moment. In fact, you have nothing but this moment. The past is gone and the future is not here yet. Live as if this second is all you have, as if this activity is the only activity you have ever done or ever will do. Finally, you have to deal with random thoughts. No doubt thoughts having to do with the past or the future will creep up into your brain. You’ll be reminded of what you didn’t do today or what you need to do tomorrow. Simply let these thoughts come and go. Don’t dwell on them, but keep your focus on what matters. If you need to write down a brief note about an important thought, do so, but then return immediately to your intention.

Remember: Mutli-tasking is the enemy here. We need to think in terms of quality, not quantity. By investing your whole attention in a task you’ll be amazed at the results and actually will accomplish more.

Intention and Attention are two amazing tools which can help you live life in the way you’ve dreamed. Take a few seconds before your next task and give it a try. You might just be amazed. As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts and other ideas which have proved useful to you.

Cheers,

Chris

Comments (4)

Coaching/Leadership

Jillian Says:
August 12th, 2008 at 6:41 pm

I’ve been mulling this one over for a while. In fact, I was thinking about it even before you posted this. I agree that the presence of mind you suggest can certainly help you live a more passionate life, but I’m thinking there may be more to it than that.

I mean, can you live a more passionate life by watching TV with more intensity? Probably not.

A thought occurred to me today on the bus, as I was people watching. The lady in front of me was doing cross-stitch, and I thought, “What a pointless waste of time!” Obviously, that isn’t fair of me. It could very well be that this lady really really enjoys making little x’s out of string over and over. Who knows. Takes all kinds of people to make up the world….

Anyway, it seems that we do an awful lot of things that simply occupy our minds, but don’t really provide much stimulation. TV is the best (or worst, rather) example of such mindless activities.

Then it occurred to me that I only watch TV when I’m avoiding thinking about something I don’t want to think about, or avoiding doing something I don’t want to do.

So here’s my theory. I’m going to define “passion” as “intensity of emotion or feeling.” Therefore, I think that a lack of passion is somehow derived from a fear or unwillingness to feel some unpleasant emotion.

Some examples: some people are afraid of entering a new romantic relationship because they are afraid of getting hurt. Some people don’t want to care about (fill in the blank…. politics, religion, work, etc.) because they’re afraid of being disappointed. You don’t care, you can’t be disappointed, right?

This is where my theory on good and evil comes in handy. Perhaps if we can convince ourselves that there’s no such thing as a “bad” emotion, we will stop being afraid to feel “bad” things, and this will free us up to feel “good” things with more intensity.

I have a mantra that I repeat to myself when I’m running. After going uphill for a mile and half, when every single part of my body hurts, I chant, “Feel it, don’t fight it.” (I can’t actually take credit for that, I think I borrowed it from the Paperboys.) Then for some reason, the pain lessens, and the energy I put into fighting the pain goes back where it’s supposed to - running up the last half mile of the hill.

I’m thinking maybe that should be my mantra for the rest of life as well. What do you think?

CMK Says:
August 12th, 2008 at 6:55 pm

Uphill for a mile and a half? Nice. I have to pick the one hill in Wichita and run it over and over!

I think you’re absolutely right. Avoidance is a major passion killer. I like that idea of being present in the moment, even (or especially) in the painful or challenging moments.

I’m going to steal your mantra….if I ever run into any hills.

Jillian Says:
August 12th, 2008 at 7:01 pm

Yes there’s a fantastic hill close to where I live. It’s a five mile roundtrip from my house to the bottom of the hill and back. I haven’t made it all the way yet, but even part way it kicks my butt. Feels good.

I’m pretty sure the mantra works even if you’re running on flat ground. Feel free to steal.

Ross Boone Says:
August 13th, 2008 at 8:46 pm

Chris,

it sounds like great advice. I will try it for the rest of tonight and hopefully I remember it tomorrow. One thing it has done for me already is to remind me of what should be done first. I better go unpack my bags from this weekend before I read more